Warning: Reading this will not permit you to remain in a bad mood.
Q: How Do You Catch a Unique Rabbit?
Unique Up on It.
Q: How Do You Catch a Tame Rabbit?
Tame Way.
Q: How Do Crazy People Go Through The Forest ?
They Take the Psychopath
Q: How Do You Get Holy Water?
You Boil the Hell Out Of It
Q: What Do Fish Say When They Hit a Concrete Wall?
Dam!
Q: What Do Eskimos Get From Sitting on The Ice too Long?
Polaroids
Q: What Do You Call a Boomerang That Doesn't work?
A Stick
Q: What Do You Call Cheese That Isn't Yours?
Nacho Cheese.
Q: What Do You Call Santa's Helpers?
Subordinate Clauses.
Q: What Do You Call Four Bullfighters In Quicksand?
Quatro Cinco.
Q: What Do You Get From a Pampered Cow?
Spoiled Milk.
Q: What Do You Get When You Cross a Snowman With a Vampire?
Frostbite.
Q: What Lies At The Bottom Of The Ocean And Twitches?
A Nervous Shipwreck.
Q: What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup?
Anyone Can Roast Beef.
Q: Where Do You Find a Dog With No Legs?
Right Where You Left Him.
Q: Why Do Gorillas Have Big Nostrils?
Because They Have Big Fingers.
Q: Why Don't Blind People Like To Sky Dive?
Because It Scares The Dog.
Q: What Kind Of Coffee Was Served On The Titanic?
Sanka.
Q: What Is The Difference Between a Harley And a Hoover ?!
The Location Of The Dirt Bag.
Q: Why Did Pilgrims' Pants Always Fall Down?
Because They Wore Their Belt Buckles On Their Hats.
Q: What's The Difference Between a Bad Golfer And a Bad Skydiver?
A Bad Golfer Goes, Whack, Dang!
A Bad Skydiver Goes Dang! Whack.
Q: How are a Texas Tornado and a Tennessee Divorce the Same?
Somebody's Gonna Lose A Trailer.
Final thought:
Support bacteria. They're the only culture some people have.
